Are you a Bitcher or a Whiner?   (either gender can be either).

One of the best ways to fool your ever-ready, first line of defense, Emotional Guidance System is to learn to play with the little devil.  If you can laugh at your own at your own anxiety management methods…I mean….when they’re funny….even though when you are full force into convincing the world of the undeserved pain in your situation…you can win.

Because winning is not some big prize, it’s not even lots of money or the number one goal of third graders in 2009–fame.  It’s really not. It’s the journey.  That’s all you have.  All I have.  How funny are we?  

As a “fun with anxiety” starting point, it’s critically important (ha) to determine if you are a Bitcher or a Whiner.  Which one of the following sounds like you?

If you have issues with your new supervisor.  Do you:

Ask aggressive questions, such as, “Where does she get off saying that?” “Just what kind of goddess does she think she is?” Point out any weaknesses he or she has.  Make sweeping statements such as, “What she said is a load of crap!  I don’t need this kind of treatment.  This whole project is ridiculous!”  Get physical, slamming doors and throwing paper wads at the can without trying for two points. Get physical, feel your face redden and your heart speed up.  Start listing the way you’re more qualified than your supervisor.  Exclaim that you shouldn’t have to put up with such incompetence (though, of course, you’re only trying to help the entire team).  Describe previous better supervisors.  

Or, do you?

Get nasal and list other areas of your life that aren’t going well. Get physical, feel a headache coming on. Focus more on your pain and how you have been treated unfairly than on the faults of the supervisor.  Compare how you are treated compared to others…Mama always did like you best. Get physical, and share how tired you are.  Slip in to yesteryear, and how you should have finished the degree you wanted in ________, but you didn’t because _________wasn’t supportive, you didn’t have enough time, other people had more money, were better looking, smarter, and caught all the breaks.

You think the room is too warm.  Do you?

Stand up and rip off any outer layers, heaving a sigh heard by everyone.  State over and over that the room is too hot and that you shouldn’t have to put up with the inconvenience.  Pick up nearby folder and frantically fan your face as if saving your life. Mention you’re pretty sure whoever is in charge is purposely keeping the room too warm because he/she is an absolute jackass.

Or do you?

Leave outer layers on, heaving many, sad sighs. Mention to those around that you think you’re coming down with something.  Say you’d like to take off your sweater but you don’t want to hurt your cousin’s feelings…the one in Illinois who gave you the sweater….add that you don’t know why no one ever bothers to give you thoughtful Christmas gifts when they spend so much time finding perfect gifts for everyone else. Mention you’re pretty sure whoever is in charge is purposely keeping the room too warm because he/she doesn’t care about other people’s comfort.  

You have the idea.  Really, give your style some thought.  If you really want to have some fun…Ask someone close to you to rate whether you are more of a Bitcher or a Whiner.  Oh, of course, I know you don’t really ever complain….