Okay.  We can see that it is not criticism which is the problem, it is OUR REACTIVITY to criticism that is a PROBLEM.

Since:  To be married is to be criticized.

To be part of a family   is to be criticized.

To have a job is to be criticized.

A driver yelled out the window while I was crossing the street (okay, not in the crosswalk). 

To be alive is to be criticized.  How criticism affects YOU, now that’s your CHOICE.  Who’s in charge?  Who’s in charge of you?  If you react automatically and defensively to criticism, you are NOT IN CHARGE of you.  If you don’t believe anyone can BE IN CHARGE of themselves, take responsibility, then you’ll have to go back to the old standards.  Defensiveness and negativism.

Now I don’t want to be not in charge of me.  But, it’s tough.  I haven’t been able to stop others from criticizing me.  Or, maybe I have.  How can I know, since when I’m anxious, I can INTERPRET ANYTHING and EVERYTHING as criticism.  Your tone, for example.  “You said, you didn’t mind if I was late, but I COULD TELL by your TONE that you think I’M NOT AS GOOD A PERSON as a woman who’d get home on time.”

Sheesh.  I’m a very good debater, but it hasn’t worked to simply defend myself and try to come up with silly rationales why I shouldn’t be criticized because I am simply NEVER WRONG. 

So, this is what we’re going to do over the next several days.  We’re going to learn to greet criticism (real or perceived) with a big ole sweet kiss.  We’re taking back that power, baby.      Taking it back.  Getting in charge.  We’re going to stop throwing little pieces of life away.

Bonus:  We’re going to be so much fun to be around.  Because we give kisses for criticism.    Let’s go get someone to criticize us!  We’re IN CHARGE.  We’re gonna smoooooooooooooooch you.